I’ll be completely honest. When I initially stumbled across Near Sighted Owl‘s linkup I Am Proud of My Size I was not very interested. Body image is one of those topics that I just tend to shy away from engaging in. I don’t have very strong feelings either positive or negative in regards to my body… Largely, I’m just disinterested.
I’m a size 12, mostly. I’d be stunningly average it weren’t for the fact that I have breasts that can only be confined by a 34H bra.
That’s a detail that’s both could be considered a blessing and a curse.
On the one hand, I like the curves but I’m less enthusiastic about the fact that I have no choice but go to a specialty shop to buy and then drop $80 per bra. Never mind the fact that finding shirts that are stylish and actually fit nicely are something of a unicorn hunt and then are generally more than what I want to pay on a single clothing item.
There’s a reason why I’m a jeans and t-shirt girl 90% of the time. It’s called I’m cheap and lazy.
My elusive size exists in this no man’s land in between the women’s section and the plus size section. Most of the time what I find in women’s ends up being too small in the bust or end up being too short. What I find in the plus section fits fine in the bust but since I lack a significant belly makes me look like I’m wearing a small camping tent.
Logic would say, buy the plus sized shirt and alter to fit… but once again, I’m cheap and lazy.
And herein lies my issue with body image… It has nothing to do with my body. I’m happy with my body. My body is fine.
My issue has to do with fashion. I have a body type that is not mass market. It takes me so long to find things that fit acceptably that I have lost interest in being any sort of fashionable. I have better ways to spend my time. I have better ways to spend my money.
The reason I start feeling weird and ashamed is because I feel like there’s a lot of pressure to put a lot of money and effort into your wardrobe as a woman, and that I’m somehow inferior because I’m not all that interested… and that’s something I don’t think is okay either.